Like many things in life, our society teaches us that being a loner is a bad thing. You’re expected to have lots of friends, be upbeat and willing to talk to anyone and everyone – anything less, and you’re considered weird or rude.
For me, being a loner ultimately means being an independent person. Independent people are good on their own, and ultimately rely on theirselves to create their own happiness. They don’t need to rely on lots of social situations to bring them satisfaction, and they don’t need to constantly be surrounded by others to make theirselves feel better. They create their own way, and usually don’t feel the need to rely on others to do so.
I definitely fall into the category of a loner. My happy place is a weekend full of no plans, and no one to see. That doesn’t mean that I don’t WANT to see people or make friends – it just means that I need a serious balance between the two. After hours or days of socializing, I definitely need an even longer break away from social situations. I’m perfectly content in the life I live, and can easily go an entire weekend without speaking to anyone, and be perfectly fulfilled in that.
I started watching Gilmore Girls not too long ago (I know, I’m SUPER late to the game), and I’m already obsessed. There’s an episode where Rory, the shy and independent character on the show, is told by her school that she needs to start socializing more. They’re concerned about her social habits, because each day during lunch, she puts headphones in and reads a book, alone. What the staff at the school doesn’t see is her life outside of school. She has a best friend and a boyfriend, who she spends most of her time with, but they don’t go to the same school as her. Rory is the type of character who is perfectly confident in herself, and doesn’t ever feel the need to cave to social peer-pressure. Fast forward to the end of the episode where she goes off on her headmaster for making her join a girls club, just because the staff pressured her into it. The headmaster finally realizes that Rory isn’t “weird” or is a student they need to be concerned with. She just does things her own way, in her own time.
I’m definitely a Rory in life. I have friends, and enjoy social situations, but I do so on my own time, and in my own way. I pride myself of being different. I LOVE it. I’m confident enough in myself and the way I do things, and I’m happy to be a loner. I’m happy to sit alone during lunch and read my books and listen to my music, because duh, that’s what makes me happy.
To all you loners out there, I see you, and you rock.
Photos by Todd White